A Working Mama's Struggle: Making A Living While Making A Life

Better 1? 

Better 2?

Linking up with Colleen over at Martin Family Moments for the Working Moms Link-Up. I am soooo glad she is hosting this link up because I too, read a ton of fellow Catholic Mom/Superhero blogs that seem to balance the insanity of staying at home with kids, homeschool, home-cooked meals, family crafts, and successfully making a home for a family (like mine) of 6 (or more) with little to no chaos and mayhem, I feel simply inadequate. I am so jealous of those moms but I know the choices they make require a lot of struggle and sacrifice as well. I have been a stay at home mom. Long before the thought of being Catholic or homeschooling was even a blip on my radar. And even though I know and understand the struggles, I love and miss it. I loved the one on one time with my little ones. Levi and Kinsey had a much less harried lifestyle than Ethan and Alayna do. But with two teenagers in da house we do a lot of running, sporting events, and big kid stuff with the little kids in tow. Here's the thing, though. I feel like a miserable failure at all of it. I forget things like crazy. Just in the last month I have acquired a list a mile long of my failures. I took snack to preschool when it WASN'T snack day. I didn't send my son to daycare in pajamas when it was pajama day. I forgot to take snack to preschool when it WAS snack day. I forgot to pick my son up from daycare for preschool and then on the very same day almost forgot to pick him up to take him back to daycare. I forgot it was Valentine's Day and didn't send Valentine cards to preschool, and then I forgot when Kindergarten screening was. This was all one kid! ONE of my kids has suffered this much neglect in a little over a month. I have not slept a full night in almost two years. Alayna is still nursing, She is due to have oral surgery in the very near future. Like at a hospital, with anesthesia. My tiny, little, 17 month old baby. Who still wears size 12 month clothes. SURGERY! Kinsey is supposed to be getting braces, also in the very near future. (Did I mention we don't have dental insurance?) And this is why I am stressed. And why I forget things. And why I work. Because my children's health insurance is through my employer. And, like Colleen, my kids ask to eat on a pretty regular basis. Colleen has asked that we answer a few questions. So, I told you all that to tell you this:

1) What do you do for work and why do you work: I am an Executive Administrative Associate at a Christian home for abused and neglected kids. I handle most of the HR stuff, insurance issues, and coordinate all of the intake information for incoming children. I do it because I LOVE it and because my husband and I have maxed out all of our credit cards and taken a ton of loans out for my college education, our wedding, and the purchase of a money pit that we have completely refurbished and now proudly call home. Not to mention the birth of our five year old was an emergency C-Section that resulted in eleventybillion dollars worth of medical bills. And the last was a scheduled C-Section that cost about two dollars less than the first. Oh, and because we needed a little thing called health insurance. And food, electricity, and water are nice also.

2) Did your mother work: Nope.

 

3) Describe a typical work day: I get up at 6:30, after a gentle nudging by the hubs. He makes and brings my coffee to me while I get ready. We tag team the little kids usually but sometimes he manhandles it all himself. Like, if I accidentally sleep until 6:45. At 7:40 we usually make the 15 minute drive into town. I drop the little kids off at daycare. I drop Kinsey off at the bus or drive her to the middle school, and drop Levi off at whatever his destination is for the day. Sometimes he stays home. I arrive at work around 8ish and work until 4:30 most days. Then I make my regular rounds of pick up. Kinsey has pitching practice on Mondays and stays after school for Insanity (the workout) twice a week so we juggle those days. We usually arrive home around 5:30. Depending on how exhausted I am, I either start dinner or wait for the hubs. We eat around 7:30, juggle baths and sit as a family for maybe an hour. Then off to bed for everyone at 10. 

4) What's the best part about having a job: Hands down, the best part of my job is working in a Christian environment with people who support, encourage, and pray together. I have the best co-workers and employer anyone could imagine. I LOVE my job! 

5) What's your least favorite part: Missing those hours every day with my little ones. And the mommy guilt that comes along with those things.

6) What would make your life easier: Well, having the best daycare provider in the world is a huge comfort but a magical device I could speak dates, times, events, and important things into that would remind me automatically would be great too. And not something I have to try to remember to type it into. Like, maybe if my phone could call me in the morning and say, "Hey! Don't forget Ethan has snack today." Or, "Hey, it's 11:15. You should go get your son before he is the last one picked up from preschool and looks at you with those you know what you did eyes." That would be super. But let me reiterate! I only want to speak to the device. No typing or manual searching and retrieving. It must work with NO effort on my part, whatsoever. Easy, right?

7) How do your children handle their mom's career: My kids are great and they love what I do. I think they are proud of the fact that I help at risk kids. 

8) Do you feel supported in what you do: ABSOLUTELY! Plus, it's not really like our family has a choice at this point in our lives. I prayed a lot when I was pregnant with Alayna about whether I could serve God better at home with my own kids or at work, helping other kids. Ultimately, everything worked out in such a way the answer was clear. I am best serving Him in my current position. At least for now.

9) What are your future goals when it comes to work/motherhood: Work: I want to grow with this ministry and be a part of God's plan within it. Motherhood: Since there are no more babies in our future I want to make the very best of my time with my kids. This summer in particular. Ethan starts Kindergarten next year and I want this summer to be unforgettable for him! I also want to spend some quality time with Kins. She will be a freshman next year and that's a tough time in a girl's life. She has done a great job making good choices this far but the challenges only get tougher from here. I want her to know her mom is in her corner and always has time for her.

10) What are some tips that help you balance it all: I don't. I don't balance well at all. I have always been clumsy. I drop the ball all the time. And I have no hand/eye coordination so I very seldom land right on target. I either overshoot or undershoot but it doesn't matter. Because at the end of the day my family knows they are the most important thing in my world and while I fail miserably on a pretty consistent basis, the fact that I work away from home reminds me of how very precious every moment we have together is to me. 

 

If you are still reading this little novella, I would just like to say thanks for sticking with me through the ranting and raving complaints and on into the question and answer portion. Finding other Catholic moms who share the same struggles, whether they work inside or outside the home has been a huge solace for me the past year. It is so comforting to know I am not alone in the celebrations and failures within my family. I love all my fellow blogging mama's and my readers. Ick! Sappy, sappy, sappy. Thanks again, Colleen. Go check the betters!

 

~THE END!~